"I went through hell this deployment, my husband and I discovered that we had lost our planned pregnancy (two days before he left) and we had to go through all of that alone and away from each other. I was in my last semester trying to finish my degree and was unable to fully grieve both the loss of our baby as well as the temporary loss of my husband. The one thing I learned quickly was to let people in your life know exactly what is going on with you. I told my instructors and they were quite lenient with me. Because I was open with people I was not only able to finish my classes and graduate on time but I also did it with straight A’s! I also learned that it is very important to know when to accept the fact you’re not a super hero and can’t do everything on your own. Know when to ask for help and don’t be ashamed of the fact you can’t do it all alone all the time. The other thing I learned is that if you don’t have family and friends in the area find other people in the same situation as you. You won’t get along with every military spouse, girlfriend, boyfriend, parent, etc. but all you have to do is find a few that you click with and stick with them. Maybe they are new and you’re seasoned, or you’re new and they’re seasoned, or you’re all new and/or seasoned, whichever the combo it is important to find these people. These are the people you can talk to about everything you’re going through and they will understand more than anyone else, it makes life so much easier to have someone to go through this with. You never know, they might just end up becoming a part of your extended family (unrelated of course) because during the most difficult times they were there and could understand when no one else could.”